An old carpenter was blind but he would sit in the pub carving little figures.
If you asked what he was carving he would always tell the kind of wood before he told you the figure.
He bragged that he could tell any kind of wood by smell.
Everyone tried to stump him but he always got the right wood.
A few of his friends came up with a plan. They got an old lady to lay on the bar.
The old man sniffed and thought and sniffed again. He told them to turn the wood over so the old lady lay on her stomach and he sniffed again.
His face lit up and he said
“You tried to trick me, this is the shithouse door from a tuna boat.”